Hello, friends,

If you’re reading this, then you’re probably still processing the horrifying developments in Los Angeles over the past 48 hours.

I don’t have anything new to say about the despicable authoritarian behavior of our government toward the people of L.A. If you’re a regular reader of this Substack, then you know where I stand. I’ve said it all on my Instagram Stories, Threads, and Substack Notes.

All I want to do today is provide a breather, a brief recharge — a palate cleanser, if you will. A bit of joy to sustain us before we return to resistance. In my case, that’s almost always television and pop culture. And a bit of touching grass.

Here’s what’s keeping a smile on my face these days — hope you’ll check them out too.

If you’re a regular reader of my work and wish to support my endeavors, please consider becoming a paid subscriber. Or, you can give a one-time donation by buying me a coffee.

Pee-wee as Himself

If you haven’t checked out the fantastic documentary Pee-wee as Himself yet, I highly recommend you rectify this ASAP — especially if you’re a Gen-Xer. (It’s currently available to stream on Max.)

I was eight years old when Pee-wee Herman was at the center of the pop culture zeitgeist: The year was 1985, and suddenly, MTV was regularly featuring this weird dude with a squeaky voice in a too-small grey suit and red bow tie. (I hadn’t started watching Late Night With David Letterman yet, so I had no clue who Pee-wee was.)

Next thing I knew, I was begging my parents to take me to see Pee-wee's Big Adventure. I loved the movie, though I distinctly remember my dad trying to persuade me to see Back to the Future instead. (I did, like, a week later, solidifying my lifelong Michael J. Fox crush.)

Although I couldn’t get the Champs’ “Tequila” or those sardonic catchphrases like, “I know you are, but what am I?” out of my head, the concept of “Pee-wee Herman” confused the shit out of me. Like, I knew somewhere in the recesses of my mind that his real name was Paul Reubens, but Reubens’ deliberate intention to turn this childlike character into performance art worked wonders on Gen-X kids like me: I genuinely thought Pee-wee was a real person for years thanks to the omnipresent “Pee-wee Herman as himself” billing.

My Pee-wee fandom grew even more fervent at that time because HBO, sensing a strong marketing tie-in, put Reubens’ seminal 1981 stage show The Pee-wee Herman Show on heavy rotation. Never mind that it contained tons of inappropriate jokes (“Lou from prison!” anyone?) — I was hooked on the subversive, 1950s children's show-inspired humor.

By the time Pee-wee's Playhouse rolled around in 1986, I was starting to outgrow Pee-wee Herman. But I still watched. If anything, it was a hoot watching Phil Hartman, Laurence Fishburne, S. Epatha Merkerson, and Natasha Lyonne ham it up as members of Pee-wee’s whimsical world. In 1988, I went to see Big-Top Pee-wee during summer camp and once again, Pee-wee confused the shit out of me: Now I was supposed to believe him as a leading ladies' man who was having sex with Valeria Golino? Something just wasn’t adding up.

Even though my confusion regarding Reubens and the Pee-wee character cleared up over the past few decades (thanks, adulthood!), Pee-wee as Himself is a must-watch for any Paul/Pee-wee fan. Yes, it’s a lively jaunt down memory lane, but it’s also a stark insight into the life of a creative genius.

A creative genius who was treated abominably by our homophobic American society.

Through Pee-wee as Himself — reverently directed by Pee-wee fan Matt Wolf, we are painfully reminded that the 1980s were a terrible time to be both gay and a cultural icon. Reubens explains that he made a conscious decision to go back into the closet — after spending most of the 1970s in a loving relationship with a man named Guy — to pursue his career. The upsetting truth is, yeah, Reubens would've been destroyed if he had been out and proud in the 1980s. What's even more heartbreaking is that this decision may very well have saved his life: Guy succumbed to AIDS several years after their breakup. It's quite possible that, by remaining closeted -- and putting his career first — Reubens avoided contracting HIV.

(Though it looks like another 1980s vice ultimately contributed to his 2023 death from leukemia and lung cancer: The myriad of personal photographs and home movies in Pee-wee as Himself almost always show Reubens holding a cigarette.)

I’m sad that Reubens, despite living until age 70, never seemed to find comfort with his sexuality. But a big reason for that was the way our awful, puritanical society treated him: He became a social pariah after he was caught pleasuring himself at an adult theater in 1991. (Thanks to the viciousness of American media, my impressionable 14-year-old self bought into the propaganda, and I’m ashamed to admit that I thought he was a pervert for a long time. I'm so sorry, Paul.)

Pee-wee as Himself also examines how Reubens just never got a fair shake after his 1991 arrest. In 2002, he was charged with misdemeanor possession of child pornography. That was such an infuriating chapter in his life, because, yeah, he owned some vintage pornography — so what? The child pornography charges were eventually dropped.

At the same time, because there's always a dark side to a creative genius, we learn from the documentary that Reubens was notoriously difficult to work with. His interactions with Pee-wee as Himself director Wolf can get pretty cringe at times, given Reubens’ well-established reluctance to cede creative control.

It was especially upsetting to hear about Reubens’ falling out with the late Phil Hartman, who co-wrote Big Adventure and had a hand in creating Pee-wee's Playhouse (he played Kap'n Karl in both the TV series and the 1981 Pee-wee Herman Show special). Hartman, as we all know, was a creative genius in his own right, and he deserved his own success. When he realized Reubens wouldn’t give him his due, he joined the cast of Saturday Night Live. (And the rest is history.)

The most poignant moment in the documentary, however, is when Wolf shares audio of Reubens’ final message to him. The actor recorded this voice note the day before he died, and from the very first word, Reubens sounds like a different person. A person who knows his time is running out.

Reubens kept his cancer battle private from almost everyone he knew (including Wolf). Considering that he spent most of his professional career hiding behind a manufactured persona, I view these parting words as a special gift for his fans. Maybe that wasn’t Reubens’ intention, but speaking as one of the millions of people who loved him for his talent, I appreciate his willingness to pull back the curtain, even for just a couple of minutes.

Steve Guttenberg

Keeping with my 1980s cultural icon theme, I’m here to say that we need to give more love to actor Steve Guttenberg. Like Pee-wee, Guttenberg was everywhere 40 years ago: Police Academy, Short Circuit, Three Men and a Baby, The Day After, Cocoon, to name a few. By the 1990s, his career dwindled, and he’s best remembered from the Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen vehicle It Takes Two. In the 2000s, he was relegated to Hallmark Christmas rom-coms, playing Santa Claus’ son, Nick. He did have a great "ho ho ho," for a Jewish guy, FWIW.

We all rediscovered Guttenberg earlier this year when he showed up on a news report about the California wildfires. Back in January, Guttenberg was interviewed by a local L.A. reporter about his attempts to move cars out of the line of fire to help clear paths for firefighters. The news clip went viral, mainly because the young reporter clearly had no clue who Guttenberg was, which made the moment all the more adorable.

Check out Desi Lydic’s spirited reaction on The Daily Show:

Guttenberg soon became one of the many unsung heroes of the wildfires. The next thing you knew, he was being interviewed by everyone from Jimmy Kimmel to CNN to CBS Sunday Morning.

Now, Steve Guttenberg is one of my favorite things about Instagram. He regularly posts videos of himself walking down the street -- usually in New York -- talking about everything he's trying to appreciate about life. I love listening to him wax poetic about the new things he's been trying (like a spin class!), and just watching him smile about the little things.

Thanks, Steve, for being the inspiring voice we need in these dark times.

steveguttenberg

A post shared by @steveguttenberg

Seriously, anytime I need a mood boost, watching one of his videos does the trick.

Paul Reubens may have left us, but Steve Guttenberg is still here, and all he wants to do is celebrate life. We need his joyful attitude to keep us strong as we continue to battle for our democracy.

Outrageous

For those of you with a BritBox subscription, I want to put the upcoming series Outrageous on your radar. Yes, it’s a fun, frothy British period drama all about the aristocratic Mitford sisters, who dominated newspaper headlines back in the 1930s and 1940s. But it’s also an extremely timely TV series for 2025. A quick tease: One of the sisters married the leader of the British Union of Fascists, and another one developed a disturbing infatuation with Adolf Hitler.

I actually did a ton of research on the Mitford family (highly recommend reading The Sisters: The Saga of the Mitford Family) because I wrote the press production notes for Outrageous.

Hope you’ll check out the series when it drops on June 18!

Finally, on Friday night, I took a break from the nonstop chaos to participate in a glorious Girls on the Run 5K (walk-run combo) with my daughter.

It was our first ever 5K, and I’m so proud of us both!

Getting out into nature and moving our bodies is always a wonderful antidote to the news cycle. It recharges our batteries 🔋 and helps us refresh for the fight ahead.

As always, I thank you for reading,

—Sarene

P.S. If you’re a regular reader of my work and wish to support my endeavors, please consider becoming a paid subscriber. Or, you can give a one-time donation by buying me a coffee.

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